Moments I Cannot Live Without

Last night I got home pretty late from school.  I found that I was SUPER tired after class and wondered how I was going to make it.  To be sure, my eyelids were past their point before class ended.  I stood out in the parking lot talking to some friends (an interesting match...a Jew, a Muslim, and a Mormon).  It was fun and relaxing and though I was well aware that the minutes were ticking on (each one putting me home later and later), I stayed until I was pretty pumped and happy and ready for a 2 hour drive.

Luckily I have friends I can talk to on my way home...it sure makes the drive a lot shorter.  But still, I don't fall straight into bed the moment I walk in the door.  Last night it was a bit of email, etc....

Until it was now VERY late.  I walked into Kelsey's room, as I always do, just to watch her sleep, give her a quick hug and kiss goodnight.  Her night light gives me enough light to see, unlike the boys' room.  Last night I covered her up, as usual, and she began to squirm a bit.  I stayed and she groggily opened her eyes JUST A LITTLE BIT.  She saw me, smiled a happy tired smile, and put her arm around me and promptly fell back asleep.  I kissed her on the cheek and was at peace as I went to bed. 

I asked her if she remembered it this morning and she said no...but with a little thought she did remember and again I saw that same happy smile.

These are moments I cannot live without.

Another moment is the phone call I have with Jordan each night as I travel home.  I love that he still likes talking to me and will talk to me about all sorts of teenager type things.  He thinks a lot, worries a lot, and has fun a lot.  He is typical and it is fun to be a part of that even though I am not by his bedside.  But when I am home he makes sure that I come say goodnight "even if [I] am asleep" he says, after my studying is done.

I cannot live without those moments either.

To see Cody run home as he gets off the bus after school singing or shouting something, smiling as he passes my "slow" running....or his hugs just because....or his "do you love me, mama?"....all moments I cannot live without.

Spencer is intense...that is a given.  Last night as I drove home with the clear starry sky I thought about him and how much he LOVES nature and the earth God created.  I was talking to a friend about an upcoming camping trip and mentioned my sister and how she said, "Camping?  Like in the dirt?"  I laughed at the comment and thought of Spencer.  "Why don't more people like to be outside, mom?"  "Why don't people learn to live off the earth more?"  "I would love to live on a farm or a big ranch...in God's country, wouldn't you?"  I have to agree.  That is one place that Spencer and I hold dear, as well as dearly in common.  Thinking of that....thinking of him....another moment I cannot live without.

So...though I sometimes say that I cannot live without the newest episode of Psych or Chuck, or definitely without Almond Joy or Chocolate, or maybe even my laptop or my cell phone, I am wrong.  ALL those things (and many more I may think I cannot live without) are worth nothing compared to my family...and

Moments I Cannot Live Without